If you've celebrated a lot of Valentines Day's, you might be having a brain freeze when it comes to thinking of a special gift to give. Hint. These are not good.

Show the love of your life how much you love them and proving you'll be with them till the end. Plan out the end for them. Nothing says love like death.

If you love a good snack while you...snack, then sneak a burger into bed with you. Hell, it's what the President does. What you don't want to do is munch on this. Now, if you do, remember you might hear this really loud..."WATCH THE TEETH! WATCH THE TEETH!"


It's a neat trick. Shaving a heart into your back hair, but really, they might appreciate the Brazilian heart a little bit more.

This is horrific, yet fitting. Spelling out I love you with fake dog poop sums up how single people feel about this fake-ass holiday. It's the perfect shitty I love you.

If they love you, they'll laugh. If they claim you're an idiot for using fake dog poop, then you need to plan either a wedding, or a renewal of vows because they're a keeper.

And finally, a pet is a nice gift idea. That is unless you think that sea urchins are pets. But, then again, if you're going to give your mate crabs on Valentines Day, this is the better option. (It's VD Day here at the radio station. Bring your own little combs.)


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